Dads Took To Twitter To Air Their Funniest Fathering Struggles
We love dads who are involved in their kids’ lives. It’s so nice to see the trend of men being more involved in parenting than ever before. Now, dads know all of the struggles that moms have known for years. Parenting is a wild ride, so these dads are taking to Twitter to talk about just how wild of a ride it is.
These are tweets by dads, for dads—and for anyone else who could use a laugh today.
When You Let Your Kids Make Dinner

Who’s to say that there’s anything wrong with putting candy corn on pizza? Avant-garde chefs are probably doing it in fancy restaurants right now. We think she is onto something.
It’s Self-Explanitory

There is toothpaste on the wall because this kid was brushing her teeth, and that’s all you need to know. It makes perfect sense if you think about it some more.
His Real Name

Kids come up with some wild ideas sometimes, and all you can really do as a parent is shrug and go along with it. This dad has the right idea.
Mmm, Salary

Imagine if you worked eight hours every day of the workweek and all you got in return was a bunch of celery. I like celery as much as the next guy, but that would be awful.
A Wet Lunch

Have you ever seen a soup that wasn’t wet? It wouldn’t be a soup then, would it? Maybe this girl just doesn’t like soup, which is fair. Don’t criticize it for being too wet, though.
The Most Dad Thing Ever

This man is now a dad. He watched a very dad movie with his own father and had the most dad experience of his life. What even is a transmission?
Mom Is The Scariest Monster
![@XplodingUnicorn Twitter2 tweet: [bed time]
Me: Your mom told you to stay in bed.
3-year-old: There's a scary monster in my closet
Me: Scarier than Mom?
3: *goes to bed*](https://www.dadpatrol.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/11/@XplodingUnicorn-Twitter2-22643.jpg?b=0&c=0&width=800&height=533&top=51&left=0&zoom=1.41093474427)
There may very well be a scary monster in this kid’s closet, but that monster has got nothing on a tired mom who really wants to go to sleep right now.
Parenting Done Right
![@TheNateWolf Twitter tweet: Me: goodnight kids
Kids: goodnight dad
Me: goodnight monster that eats children who are bad
Wife: [through radio under the bed] GOODNIGHT](https://www.dadpatrol.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/11/@TheNateWolf-Twitter-67651.jpg?b=0&c=0&width=800&height=533&top=0&left=0&zoom=1.52285714286)
This is the right way to parent. Sure, you might scar your kids forever, but at least you’re having fun with your spouse, which is all that really matters in the end.
Rival Dads

There is an unspoken war going on in every neighborhood to determine who is the best neighborhood dad. Your Halloween offering can earn you some serious points, apparently. It’s all about those full-size candy bars.
Kids Are Noisy

This dad used to be the life of the party, but now that he has kids, his party life has slowed down a bit. Now his kids are bringing the noise.
Always Thinking About Dessert

These kids always have sugar on the brain. They want dessert before dinner, after dinner, in the morning, and before bed. When will enough be enough for them? We get that they like cake, but…
The Disney Experience

There’s a huge difference between Disney World and Disney on Ice, and these kids know it. Who wants to watch people prance around on figure skates when they could be on Space Mountain?
When She Makes Her Own Breakfast
![@simonchollard Twitter tweet: [5:45 AM, in a harsh whisper]
Daddy, don't worry, you can sleep. I'm making my own breakfast, how do you turn on the oven?
Me: I'm up.](https://www.dadpatrol.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/11/@simonchollard-Twitter-43109.jpg?width=800&height=463)
Dad isn’t going to get much sleep if he’s thinking about his daughter setting fire to his kitchen. It’s nice that she wants to try to be self-sufficient, but she’s not quite there yet.
Tears All The Time

Toddlers have some very big emotions. Sometimes, those big emotions get the better of them and they end up crying over bathwater being too wet. It’s just one of the things you have to deal with as a parent.
A Long Story

When your kids tell you that something is a long story, just walk away and take their word for it. You don’t really need to know that badly. The cushions will be fine.
The Concept Of Time

Have you ever gotten into an existential debate with your four-year-old child? This dad definitely knows what that is like. Somehow, the kids always end up stumping you.
The Optimal Dad Bod

Being a dad means looking the part. When you’re a dad, looking the part means getting that dad bod in athleisure. it’s just the dad way to be. Who doesn’t love a dad bod?
A Meatball Breakdown
![@Playing_Dad tweet: [At dinner] Daughter: Daddy, how much of this meatball is meat?
Me: Probably like 90%
D: So it's 10% balls?
Me: *spits out food*](https://www.dadpatrol.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/11/@Playing_Dad-78774.jpeg?b=0&c=0&width=800&height=533&top=0&left=20&zoom=0.967332123412)
If a meatball is made mostly out of meat, then the rest of it has to be balls, right? Well, not exactly. It’s just meat in the shape of a ball. It is 90% meat and 100% ball.
Your Food Is Never Your Own

As a dad, you can’t just make a sandwich for yourself while your kids are in the house. This guy should have just made two sandwiches knowing that his kids would want one.
Shared Enemies

When you have kids, their enemies become your enemies, no questions asked. Brooklyn better watch her back because this dad is not going to stand for his daughter being bullied.
Start Searching

Kids are always looking for something, and when they can’t find whatever it is they’re looking for, they turn to their dads for some extra help. Some things are just meant to stay lost.
What Makes You A Dad?

Being a father is one thing. All you have to do is impregnate a lady. Being a dad is something completely different. It involves pranking your kids whenever you have the opportunity.
How Did She Send The Note, Then?
![@joehenan Twitter tweet: My son lost a tooth last night. I just saved myself £2 [picture of a note left saying that the tooth fairy can't come because of social distancing]](https://www.dadpatrol.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/11/@joehenan-Twitter-48766.jpg?width=800&height=955)
Unfortunately, this year, the Tooth Fairy wasn’t able to complete her teeth collecting duties because of a worldwide pandemic. She was somehow able to get into the house to leave this note, though.
When They Learn The Truth

There are some truths we choose not to reveal to our kids because we know that they’re not ready to handle them. These are some of those truths. Let’s just keep them in the dark for a little bit longer.
A Kid Secret

Sometimes kids tell the best secrets, and sometimes they don’t really understand the concept of secrets as a whole. Really, though, this kid should have washed his hands after he used the bathroom.
A Dad Truth

Have you ever noticed how much dads hate stopping while they’re on road trips? This must be the reason why. They really want to be at the front of the line.
A Kid Paradox

Kids hate going to school, but then when they get home, they just pretend that they’re at school. Make it make sense, kids. Why do you only like pretend school?
A Sweet Moment

It’s really cute when your kids say that you’re their best friend, but then you have to wonder, do they have any friends their own age? Maybe they should find some new friends.
Chicken Or Pork?

All dads should adopt this dinnertime trick. Just tell your kids that the food you made for dinner is whatever food they want to eat. They won’t know the difference.
Who’s Teaching Whom?

Math is just fresher in a kid’s mind than in our adult minds. That’s why we use them to help us do our taxes. We knew these kids would be good for something someday.