Kids Who Can’t Wait To Grow Up—But Should
Kids are in such a rush to grow up...only to get there and wish they could be young again. Adulthood isn't always all that easy or fun, so kids should slow down on trying to be all adult-like unless they want to look silly.
On the bright side, their attempts will you a good laugh.
"7 Almost 8" Years Old
Remember when you couldn't wait to get older so you could have all the freedom in the world and not have to listen to anyone? Then you got older, spent a couple of years in the workforce, and were ready to revert back.
High-Quality Fairy Business
This was a businessperson in the making. They understand how transactions work from a young age. The better the presentation and quality, the higher the return value.
Sadly, they didn't understand that in the real world, the amount of effort you put in doesn't always pay off.
Just Another "Meth" Class
Either this kid's parents are big fans of Breaking Bad, or this kid still needs to practice spelling "math."
Either way, his interests combined with specific "aqua blue" as their favorite color and "fried shrimp" for food paints an interesting picture of the kind person they'll grow up to be.
"Where My Kid Decided To Put Her Cup"
There is some logic to kids' madness. Clearly, this kid just wanted to warm up their drink a little more. They saw their parents put stuff on the stove and it comes off hot, so they thought they'd give it a shot themselves.
Mullets Are Back In Style
A 4-year-old somehow found scissors and gave their 2-year-old sister a mullet. When asked why she cut her sister's hair, she simply said, "I like mullets."
Who knows? Maybe the next generation of hairdressers will make mullets cool again.
Why Kids Can't Have Nice Things
They bought a $150 pool only for their kid to prefer swimming in the paint container. Kids really know how to make the most of the small things, and maybe we should take on their mentality and stop bothering to buy nice things altogether.
What Did Britney Do Again?
The year 2000 was THE Britney year, and whoever was a kid then grew up under her influence. However, we blissfully didn't quite understand what she "did again" and now wish we still didn't.
A Natural Handyman
A parent discovered a great way to keep their toddler busy: getting them to paint the fence with water. They look so serious about their work, and hopefully, they keep that handy attitude for when the time comes.
"The Next Picasso"
This drawing started off so well...but there is no fighting the fact that kids just want to be a part of everything so badly. If you can do it, they're convinced they can do it too. Honestly, they probably also think they did a great artistic job.
Extra Orange Mac N Cheese
This kid almost caused the waiter to want to quit their job entirely because they couldn't satisfy their demands of making their Mac N Cheese "more orange if possible." Why do kids have such particular demands, anyway?
Reason 9999 That Kids Cry
Kids cry for the funniest reasons, but they insist that they have every right to and that you're a big mean old grinch who's completely ruining their lives. How dare you not let them drink the chemicals under the sink?!
Giving The Toilet Paper A Bath
Remember during the first wave of the pandemic, when the world was fighting over TP? During that time, this toddler decided to give the TP a bath, because if they were going to be forced to bathe more frequently, they were passing on the karma.
"Just Like We Practiced"
Social cues don't necessarily apply to toddlers who haven't been conditioned by societal expectations quite yet. It makes you wonder how malleable those standards are, and if maybe we can still tailor them to let us be as free-spirited as children.
A Love/Hate Sibling Relationship
This toddler's mom just brought home her baby sister. The toddler got so mad she packed up all her stuff and tried to leave. There is only room for one kid in this household.
Dreams Really Do Come True
Imagine being young enough to once again believe in the power of fairy tales and be convinced that the bride you see on the street is the princess from your storybook.
Then imagine being the bride that kid thinks of as a fairy-tale princess. That would feel just as nice.
"You Can Call Me Captain Ravioli"
He is Sam by day and captain ravioli by night because why does one have to commit to a single identity when you can have multiple fun and empowering ones instead?
Accidentally Placed An Order For "The Extreme Fart Pack"
Rest in peace to all parents the day that their child figures out how to use online shopping. That is the day they become like us and impulsively start to purchase all kinds of things they really don't need.
A Hit And Run
"My daughter backed into a light pole and promptly got out of the vehicle and fled the scene. Her very first hit and run."
Let's just hope it's her first and last. Better to get it out of her system at a young age.
Survival Of The Fittest
The two elder siblings were trying to lay out their Pokémon cards, but the youngest kept disturbing them. So naturally, they duct-taped him to the chair.
If that's not some kind of metaphor for society, I don't know what is.
Breakfast Is Served
This 3-year-old insisted on making his mom breakfast. The menu included dried pasta on all three sections of the plate, with a dash of salt.
It's the thought that counts.
The Power Of Perception
The family had new see-through doors installed. The poor kid didn't doesn't realize that one of his favorite hide-and-seek spots had been severely compromised. As the saying goes, "all good things must come to an end."
"You're Killing Her"
You can see the genuine sorrow and grief on this child's face. This will all be worth it when she's given her doll back looking all clean and smelling fresh. It's a great way to learn gratitude.
What's The Point Of A Good View?
This pure look of disappointment is brought to you by a young girl who just found out that she climbed a hill for a whole three hours and there was nothing there but a good view. Why do adults enjoy this again?
Post-Pandemic Game Of Tag
This woman teaches first graders. Her school's "no tag" policy is obviously not working so well. The kids have cheated the system in the worst way, not realizing the implications of living in a pandemic. Must be nice.
"Things I wish I learned In College"
Kids think that adults must somehow have a Google search bar inside their heads because they're old, especially if they went to college. Let's start a petition to get dragon farts on the curriculum.
Reminder That You're Old
In today's edition of Kids Think They Understand Everything: being a parent apparently means you're really old, which basically means that you're about to die soon. The only thing left to do is hope you have a good time in the afterlife.
"Do You Have To Put On Your Tattoos By Yourself Every Day?"
Honestly, that's a valid question, and we should all be jealous of kids' sense of curiosity and their shameless ability to get answers to their burning questions, such as how you put on tattoos.
You Can Be Anything You Want
This kid was told that they can be anything that they wanted for Halloween, and they insisted on being "pants." Good on them for thinking outside the box and not settling for one of the superhero costumes at the store.
A Tomato Warning
Who wouldn't be scared if they heard that they had to go hide in their basement to escape a tomato? You'd just picture a big monster-like bloody tomato from watching too much Dexter's Lab (or whatever kids watch these days about scientific experiments).
Confirmed Not A Murderer
It sounds like this kid watched too many crime shows and now they suspect their own mother of murder when she was just trying to write a nice and thoughtful condolences card.
So Young To Be So Sassy
This note was a collaboration between this kid's mom and dad. Mom said they had to write it and dad agreed that sometimes there is just no winning in life, or at least in fights with grandma.
Always In Such A Rush To Grow Up
The joke here is that when he finally does have a lot of body hair, he's probably going to want to be able to shave it all off and wish he was still hairless.
Who Doesn't Love Sticky Notes?
Loving sticky notes is such a grown-up thing to love! There will come a time, though, when they are going to be all about the little sticky notes that they can put on their paperwork.
There Is One In Every Family
Everyone just really wants to stand out and be their own person, you know? Sometimes it really makes you stick out like a sore thumb and look like a total weirdo.
Everybody Poops
It really does take a grown-up to understand that everyone poops, including all the little pets that you want to have and will have to eventually clean up after.
She Almost Fooled Us
It is hilarious the stuff that kids think that they can get away with. Like, she actually sat down and wrote this note thinking it would actually fool her parents.
They Said Whatever
This is actually a boss move. Now every year when they ask what they want for their birthday or for Christmas, they are actually going to think of something and answer.
She's Going To Be A Boss
She has the makings of a manager and she hasn't even hit puberty yet. You know that by the time yearbook superlatives come around, she's going to be the one most likely to succeed.
He's Going To Go Far In Life
This kid is way too young to have such an opinion about women. He must have heard this from his dad. Let's see how far either of them get with the ladies.
Cute Selfies
Taking weird pictures of yourself on all the smartphones and tablets in a store is a thing all children do as they begin their journey into adulthood. It's a defining moment.
