Parents Share The Ridiculous Things Their Kids Are Hiding From Them

Kids are so funny. They think they’re so smart and know everything, but they also believe that covering their eyes with their hands makes them invisible. From secret snacks to sly toy side hustles, you’ll want to go check yourself what your kid is hiding.

The Way To A Man’s Heart Is Riavioli

ravioli
Photo Credit: Lorena Brambilla/REDA&CO/Universal Images Group via Getty Images
Photo Credit: Lorena Brambilla/REDA&CO/Universal Images Group via Getty Images

“A few years ago, I was going through my son’s (3rd grade) backpack and found a can of ravioli. That’s all well, except I never bought any ravioli. When I asked him about it, he burst into tears and pulled out a box under his bed filled with Ravioli!

“He then proceeded to tell me how this girl that picks on him and says they are married gives him ravioli every day and makes him take it. I can just picture this girl’s mother telling her the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.” —Lael_Annaed

Outsmarting His Own Parents At 3 Years Old

ball
Photo Credit: Wesley Tingey / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Wesley Tingey / Unsplash

“My 3-year-old son ‘lost’ his ball. When asked, he said he didn’t know where it was. We assumed it had been left outside to blow away in a storm or some kid took it. So we bought him a new ball.

“As soon as we gave it to him, he said ‘Thanks! I’ll get my other ball!’ He then ran straight to a bush in the neighbor’s yard and pulled out his ball.” —ElKirbyDiablo

Just Act Like Nothing Happened

alexa
Photo Credit: Grant Ritchie / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Grant Ritchie / Unsplash

“My two year old dropped our Echo and it split into two pieces. She attempted to sandwich it back together and put it back where it was.

“Now she says things like ‘Alexa play Mickey Mouse’ and then when nothing happens she says, ‘Uh oh Alexa what happened?’ You know damn well what happened.” —throwawaybutnotrlly

The Beginnings Of An Artist

crayons
Photo Credit: Kristin Brown / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Kristin Brown / Unsplash

“She’s slowly been collecting pens and hiding them in her toys. So far, no coloring outside of paper and coloring books, though. So I’m letting her get away with it.” —1drlndDormie

Who wants to bet one day she’s going to move a piece of furniture one day and find a whole artistic tableau behind it?

Someone’s Not Eating All Their Vegetables

eat
Photo Credit: Danielle Macinness /Unsplash
Photo Credit: Danielle Macinness /Unsplash

“My daughter throws her lettuce under the table for the dog to eat. The dog doesn’t like lettuce.” —IrksomePigeon

The real question is how long did it take for the parents to notice the pile of lettuce, and how big was the pile by then?

Getting Ripped From A Young Age

working out
Photo Credit: Ben White / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Ben White / Unsplash

“I just found out that my 6-year-old locks the bathroom door so he can get some privacy. Last night I looked across the kitchen to see the door slightly ajar and my son engaging in… push-ups.

“I didn’t say anything, just watched him finish his five reps, flex in the mirror and then walk out of the bathroom.” —crichins

An Innocent Crime

gummy
Photo Credit: Jonathan Castellon / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Jonathan Castellon / Unsplash

“My 7-year-old son ate half my bag of gummy bears. I know. He knows I know. I know he knows I know. I don’t think he knows I know he knows I know. So now we wait until he cracks…” —throwmeawaypoopy

Update: He did confess the crime that night. The truth always comes out.

Invisible Powers Activated

eyes
Photo Credit: Edi Libedinsky / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Edi Libedinsky / Unsplash

“My 3-year-old thinks I don’t know that she raids the snack cupboard when I’m out of the room (her face is usually full of chocolate after).

“She also thinks I can’t see her when she covers her eyes, so sneaks around me thinking she’s in stealth mode to get to something she shouldn’t.” —melanieavellano

Practice Makes Perfect

origami
Photo Credit: Carolina Garcia Tavizon / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Carolina Garcia Tavizon / Unsplash

“My daughter is trying to impress me by learning origami. She’s 7 and doesn’t think that Dad can see all the missing paper and the (messy but improving a lot) paper cranes hidden throughout her room.

“I bought two more reams of paper and just left them out on accident…” —SleepyLinkOfficial

A Lawyer In The Making

latter
Photo Credit: Scott Graham / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Scott Graham / Unsplash

Forget wills and prenups. This 4-year-old is ahead of his time: “My 4-year-old ‘wrote’ a letter she keeps in her bottom drawer. When me and my husband, die she will come home and get it.

“We’re not allowed to look at it or touch it, but apparently it says that we gave her loads of money and she gave us loads of pictures. I’m not sure what this says about her or us, but it will be interesting how long she keeps said letter.” —IdlyBrowsing

Nothing Like A Tomato As A Midnight Snack

tomato
Photo Credit: Clay Banks / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Clay Banks / Unsplash

“My kid would get up in the middle of the night and want a snack. He would sneak into the kitchen and eat a whole tomato except the little circle where it connected to the stem.

“He hid the little stem circles under whatever was on top of the trash and would go to sleep. We always made sure there were tomatoes for him.” —chisleu

Good on him for having such healthy midnight cravings.

The Utmost Organization

drawing
Photo Credit: Tong Nguyen / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Tong Nguyen / Unsplash

“My 9-year-old stepdaughter was in her room one day for hours with markers and papers. I thought she was drawing or making a picture book or something so I let it slide.

“It turns out she had our calendar and was making cards for everyone for every holiday and birthday coming up. I haven’t asked her about it, but I’m honestly super proud of her logic and longterm planning abilities.” —ApexBarber

This 9-year is more prepared and organized than most common adults.

Wishful Thinking

couple
Photo Credit: Candice Picard / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Candice Picard / Unsplash

“Not a parent, but my parents think I’m hiding a girlfriend.” —Mathematical_Pie

If you’re still single and over the age of 25, then you understand the pressure and judgment that accompany every family dinner because you haven’t brought someone home to settle down with yet. You definitely would not be hiding them the day you finally get one.

A Magical Act

reading
Photo Credit: Mark Zamora / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Mark Zamora / Unsplash

“Hiding himself every time it’s close to bedtime. My 2-year-old thinks I’ll forget to put him to bed if he runs into another room for 30 seconds.” —sentientketchup

There’s some logic to his thinking…out of sight, out mind, right?

No Permission Required

slurpee
Photo Credit: Greg Rosenke / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Greg Rosenke / Unsplash

“He’s 18. He will wait until we go to bed and then hop the back fence to go to 7 Eleven for a Slurpee. After a couple of weeks of this we confronted him and told him:

“One, you’re 18 so there is no curfew. Second, hopping fences looks like criminal activity and our neighborhood watch is on point. Third, You have a driver’s license so take the car. Finally, don’t act like you’re fooling us. You’re an adult now. Want a Slurpee? Go get it. You have money.” —oatbergen

A Wild Imagination Shows Creativity

dogs
Photo Credit: Alvan Nee / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Alvan Nee / Unsplash

“My almost 2-year-old has started telling me crazy stories as if they are real. He recently told me that our dog rides a motorcycle to go play with her friends.” —ASOIAFGymCoach73

It sounds like what’s being hidden here is the truth. Where do you draw the line between teaching them not to lie and seeing how far their creative imagination can take them?

Young Puppy Love

hearts
Photo Credit: Anna Kolosyuk / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Anna Kolosyuk / Unsplash

“He has a crush on the babysitter and tries to draw hearts to give to her. He also proposed. He is 6.” —LucretiusCarus

Maybe romance isn’t dead yet! It’s just hiding in the next generation. Give him a few more years and this kid will be breaking hearts.

Don’t Save For Tomorrow What You Can Eat Today

blueberries
Photo Credit: Gemma Evans / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Gemma Evans / Unsplash

“When my son was 5, he stashed a bunch of blueberries under his pillow for later. Problem is, not only did they get squished on night one, but he forgot about them until we changed his sheets a few days later.” —gellman

On the bright side, the stains from the blueberries might have made for some really cool free designs on the sheets and pillow.

A Not-So-Hidden Secret

kids in love
Photo Credit: Yulia Dubyna / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Yulia Dubyna / Unsplash

“My 15-year-old is trying to hide the fact that he’s found a girlfriend, he thinks he’s really smart by just saying he’s going out to get food every now and then, but it’s so easy to tell that he’s going to see someone.

“Also, his girlfriend snitched on him, she told us that she liked him…” —CorridorCrocodile

Just A Quick Side Hustle

marbles
Photo Credit: Crissy Jarvis / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Crissy Jarvis / Unsplash

“Our 9-year-old son is taking his marbles to school and screwing other kids out of their marbles. He’s got a real hustle going on there.

“He’s not allowed to take any toys to school, hence why he’s hiding it. I checked his school backpack and found probably a kilogram worth of marbles in there.” —Timmy_94

This kid has a real bright future in business.

This Is Why The “No Food Upstairs” Rule Exists

video games
Photo Credit: Jeshoots / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Jeshoots / Unsplash

“They sneak food up to their rooms so they can game and digest at the same time, but forget to bring the dishes downstairs.

“When I get in a hissyfit because I have to make my sandwich on a Tupperware lid, they swear they have NOT used any plates, but when I enter my kitchen later, a wonky tower of china looms in my sink for me to Jenga-wash.” —MamaLiq

Caught Red-Handed

homework
Photo Credit: Annie Spratt / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Annie Spratt / Unsplash

“When I was in 3rd grade, I didn’t do my homework and my parents needed to sign a form acknowledging I didn’t.

“I forged my mom’s signature as ‘Mom Jones.’ I had no clue my Mom’s name wasn’t Mom.” —SpicerJones

It was clever until it wasn’t, but in his defense, how long did it take most of us to find our parents’ real names?

It’s A Rich Man’s World

monopoly
Photo Credit: Kathy Marsh / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Kathy Marsh / Unsplash

“My 6-year-old got out of bed early on Sunday morning to sneak downstairs and steal Monopoly money from the bank in the unfinished game from the night before which was left out on the table.” —robotron20

I guess you begin to understand the value of money at quite a young age.

A Quick Game Of Hide And Seek

remote
Photo Credit: Piotr Cichosz / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Piotr Cichosz / Unsplash

“The remote. He’s only 16 months old but damn good at hiding things. I tore the living room apart and no luck. The next logical step is to waterboard his teddy bear.” —WoodysHat

He probably just wanted to keep his parents entertained with a quick game of hide and seek!

Can’t Hold Hands And Hide Toys All At Once

car
Photo Credit: Sandy Millar / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Sandy Millar / Unsplash

“We also have a rule about holding hands in parking lots. When I went to grab his hand to walk into school, he just shook his head no. I told him to grab my hand again, and again he said no. This went back and forth until I gave him my ‘serious dad face.’

“Eventually, he relented, held out his hand to grab mine, and about a dozen Matchbox cars fell out of his shirt, which he was apparently holding up with his hand. We have a rule that they’re not allowed to bring toys to school…” —Darth_Draper

Secret Reading Time

reading
Photo Credit: Annie Spratt / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Annie Spratt / Unsplash

“My daughter (who’s 9) thinks she’s being crafty hiding a book under her pillow to read after bedtime. I’ve known for about a year and let her have half an hour ‘secret reading time’ after she goes to bed.” —YorkshireWitch

On the bright side there a lot worse things she could secretly be doing after bedtime. Especially with kids being glued to their phones and iPads so much these days.

Just Needs A Little Privacy

diapers
Photo Credit: Zach Kadolph / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Zach Kadolph / Unsplash

“My 2.5-year-old daughter hides every time she poops.

“She starts by asking ‘am I wearing a diaper?’ Then she loudly announces that she’s ‘going to hide over there.’ If I ask her if she’s pooping, she screams at me ‘don’t say those words! I’m just hiding!!!'” —amsplur

A Little More Effort Required

candy
Photo Credit: Arturo Esparza / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Arturo Esparza / Unsplash

“My kids are little (4 and 8). Little one constantly eating in his room and in MY BED, denies it when I find it.

“Older one sneaks and eats in her room but then leaves the wrappers/dishes in there so I see them when I walk by. Every. Time.” —bradthemadcat

All they have to do is clean up and the mom would never know!

R.I.P. To All The Stolen Noses

nose
Photo Credit: Janko Ferlic / Unspash
Photo Credit: Janko Ferlic / Unspash

“My nose. But I’ll find it someday, you mark my words!” —HueyLewisAndTheBrews

Did you ever wonder as a kid what would happen if one day your parents said “I got your nose!” and then lost it or didn’t give it back? Why is this considered cute? It’s terrifying from the gullible kid’s perspective.

The Smell Eventually Gives It Away

couch
Photo Credit: Alexander Dummer / Unsplash
Photo Credit: Alexander Dummer / Unsplash

“After every meal, my 7-year-old has been hiding food she didn’t want to eat underneath the couch (we eat in the living room, small house). I didn’t notice until about a week ago when the entire house smelled like rot. ” —bradthemadcat