Kids are like elephants: they literally never forget. You can tell them something in passing and they'll latch onto it and then tell everyone they know and everyone they meet about all the things you wish they'd keep to themselves.
Any parent knows that this becomes magnified when you do something that your kid thinks has wronged them. Then all bets are off and they become ruthless.
Now They Have Cash On Hand All The Time
Not only did this kid carry on about this with his parents, but you just know that he told the babysitter over and over again.
Thank goodness for the invention of e-transfers, right? No more messy piggy bank messes.
At Least She Replaced It
There is that special kind of guilt that a mom carries with her when she does something that makes her kid sad.
The number of hours she spent looking for that Pete's Dragon lunchbox is probably insane.
They Do Have A Point
Can you really trust your parents about the existence of vampires if they can't keep your appointments straight?
Only time will tell if vampires are real and if Mom will take her kid to the doctor on the right day.
There Is Something About This That Is Evil
There is something about this that just doesn't sit right with me. It probably didn't sit right with her stomach, either. Aren't you gagging in your mouth thinking about it?
Of all the things to grab out of the fridge and put in the mac and cheese, why scallop juice?
It Was A Scam All Along
This is a great way to get money from people, apparently. You just pretend that the Tooth Fairy doesn't care about you anymore.
She probably did this every time she lost a tooth after that.
This Is Actually Really Cute
They just wanted to make sure that their parents and the people around them weren't afraid of the busy street!
They're going to grow up to be that friend that looks out for everyone.
She Was Just Trying To Help, OK?
Boiling your kid's toys to get rid of germs is a risky business. It's like making tea. The water has to be just the right temperature and stepped for the right amount of time.
They probably never let their mom near their toys again.
You Can't Even Trust Doctors These Days
No wonder so many of us grow up being worried about going to the doctor's office. They can't even figure out how many feet we have.
At least this kid was polite when they corrected the doctor.
Now That's A Core Memory
When you think about your kids thinking about you, you want them to remember the way you love them and the fun you've had.
Instead, kids are going to latch onto how bad your cooking is.
The Lunch Wasn't Even Different
From that day on, those kids packed their own lunches. Even though they would have eaten the same thing that day, a mistake was made.
People already get them confused enough, the last thing they need is their mom being confused, too.
Everyone Wants To Go To A Big Party
In a way, you could make the argument that they were kind of there? Just a little twinkle in their mom and dad's eyes.
Now they'll just have to throw an even bigger party to get them off the wedding.
You Can't Turn Back Time
If parents could turn back time, there are probably a million reasons why they would want to.
The good thing about this is that they can find their son another plastic bag and just lie and say it's the same one.
He Said What He Said
The problem here is that he didn't stick with his conviction. Maybe he's right and Gordon Ramsay would hate the meatloaf.
He should start doing his own cooking and maybe he'll grow up to be a chef.
Maybe They Meant It As A Compliment?
I'm sure that Mom automatically getting three stars was just their way of saying that Mom is a great cook, right?
So anything above a three is just her hitting it out of the park.
She's Never Going To Trust Again
Every time she has a quesadilla now, all she's going to be able to think about is that one time she had to suffer through burnt cheese and chicken.
You can't blame her for wanting to make a point of avoiding it.
Now They're Just Making Things Up
This kid must have been hearing about all the other parent fails on the playground and wanted to have one, too.
Kids really will just say the craziest things if they set their mind to it.
It's A Tough Question To Answer
We all know that kids are kind of like pets, and that a lot of their love can be bought with the right snacks.
That's why it's so upsetting when your dad can get it so wrong.
I Bet She Got An A
The essay was probably a whopper of emotion and frustration.
She had been sitting on that for years and she finally felt ready to get it all out and tell the world what she has been through.
They Just Want To Be Sure
They didn't want to be like one of those kids in the movies who waits for their parents to show up and they never do.
In time, that trust will be earned back and they'll stop asking.
Why Didn't She Eat It?
She missed a golden opportunity to eat that taco and teach them a real lesson.
When the taco was thrown out the window, all her power was gone. But, if she made them watch her eat it, that would stick.
It's A Traumatizing Experience
Yeah, those games sound fun, and they probably had good food, too. But, Dad made a mistake that is worth fixating on.
It's rare your parents mess up so big, so they have to take advantage of it.
There Is No Accounting For Some People
Mashed potatoes are good no matter how many lumps they have in them. That's just more potatoes.
That cafeteria lady probably felt good and kind of sad at the same time after that mom left.
Why Are Kids So Mean?
Why is it that kids have this way of latching onto the thing you're most insecure about and then commenting on it in front of everyone?
Now there isn't going to be a baby brother for a while.
That Really Hurts
It's always the little things that hurt the most, like getting hit with one of those dodge balls your teachers told you didn't hurt, or clipping your skin in a helmet clip.
He is just looking out for himself.
I'd Never Forgive Him Either
It's one thing to eat the last piece of cake, but to eat it when the birthday girl herself didn't have any?
That is something that should not be forgiven or forgotten.
She Had Just Forgotten
It had been so long in child time that she forgot what it was like to have a dry bib.
She was having a flashback while she was holding it to all the good times before.
He Just Wanted Some Cookies
There is nothing wrong with wanting to have some cookies that your mom used to make.
He just didn't feel brave enough to ask her, so he had to do it in an embarrassing way.
That Doesn't Sound Like The Chicken's Fault
To be fair, he is probably right and this wasn't the chicken's fault, but we all need someone to blame at the end of the day.
It probably turned her off chicken for a while.
She Said What She Said
If she has to miss taco night, then she might as well not be fed, or at least that's how I can imagine a kid sees it.
Hopefully, the preschool teacher got the whole story before jumping to conclusions.
Just Wait Until She Makes A Mistake
Now, if she ever gets a ticket someday for driving, her dad is going to have his sweet, sweet revenge.
He will make sure to bring it up all the time and never drop it.