15+ People Who Are Two Teabags Short Of A Full Pot
Humanity has landed men on the moon and cracked the human genome, but unfortunately, not everyone can be Albert Einstein.
So while we might have big brains and be the smartest creatures on Earth, tell it to these people who definitely didn't use them before going about their day.
Some Assembly Required
This person eloquently says, "Today I f**ked up" and after looking at this photo, we can definitely understand why.
Unless you own a pick-up truck, just assume no piece of furniture will ever fit in your car. It is an IKEA mattress, so maybe it can be taken apart, transported in the car, and then reassembled at home?
Design Me A Website
We get it, everyone nowadays uses a computer or cell phone in their day-to-day lives. But the technology involved is complex, so not everyone gets it.
But surely a person must know that the size of a website isn't its literal "screen size", right? Then again, people did use to eat Tide Pods, so perhaps my bar is set too high.
The War Of 1812
This Redditor wanted to know what major historical event happened in 1812, and while they probably should've used Google, their fellow brethren on Reddit delivered.
It was a war, it happened in 1812, and the British (later Canada) burned down the White House - that's pretty much it. Just another reason to keep an eye on those pesky Canadians.
Fresh From The Sea
if you're ever at a restaurant and you see that the price for a specific kind of seafood is listed as "market price" always do your due diligence and figure out what that actually means.
This sailor sure didn't, and these two shrimps set him back a whopping $106. Looks like he's eating Mr. Noodles for the rest of the week.
The Imperial System, American Style
This proud imperial defender proclaims "We are smarter" and then fails to realize that the United States is the largest of only three nations on Earth that use the imperial system. And the American cheese stands alone.
He's not two tea bags short of a full pot, but two cups short - which is about 473 milliliters.
Scratch And Win...Sadness
It's every man's favorite arts and crafts store - Michael's! It's okay, my spouse also dies inside every time I ask him if we can go there together, so it's probably genetic.
Anyway, this Michael's had a misguided attempt to show appreciation for their employees. Congrats, you won - as one Redditor put it - "the chance to experience what getting fired feels like".
Drunk And In Love
Have you ever been so drunk that you text your significant other where they are...only to fail to notice that they are literally sitting right beside you?
Poor Austin definitely left his brain cells at home that night, but perhaps there is no greater compliment than - despite his level of intoxication - his girlfriend being the only thing he can think about.
A Problematic Circulatory System
There are some people who criticize others for any perceived flaw, and even simply for existing. And then there's this guy who's offended by a woman and her functioning circulatory system.
Just because you can post things on the internet or send people DMs doesn't mean that you should.
One Morphine To Go, Please
I never went to pharmacology school, but they definitely measure out powerful narcotics by the pound, right? Even funnier is the requesting the morphine prescription "to go" like it's a fast-food order.
"Yes Mr. Pharmacist, I'd like one crack to-go, please."
Higher Than A Jetliner
Whether alcohol or recreational drugs, nearly everyone has done ridiculous stuff while under the influence. But have you ever been so out of it you had a Facebook discussion with yourself?
The whole point of this article is to showcase people who left their brain cells at home, but I wonder if this man had any to begin with. Maybe he's friends with the morphine guy.
Useless Expiration Dates
Whoever designed this expiration date literally had one job. Does it mean it expires two years from today? Or two years from last November? I suppose we'll never know, unless you want to do a taste test and figure it out the hard way.
Just remember, if you ever have a bad day, just think, at least you're not as useless as this expiration date.
The Phantom Pisser
Gyms often attract such wonderful people, such as narcissists who only go there to take selfies and men who harass women who are minding their own business. But the "Pee Guy" definitely wins this golden crown.
We're not sure what causes someone to want to pee in a sauna, but the yellow signage for this type of message was a nice touch.
It's Not Delivery, It's Disappointment
Frozen pizzas can be a good dinner option when you're in a time crunch or you're just too lazy to cook (no judgment here!). Someone, please buy this Gordon Ramsay-wannabe a baking pan.
So now not only does this person have no dinner, but they also get the pleasure of scraping off the baked-on pizza toppings from the oven.
My Loss Is Your Game
There are people who make a mistake and own up to it, but then there are others who proudly double down on their stupidity, such as this guy selling a "used" evergreen tree after the holidays.
He confidently boasts "My loss is your game, no silly offers I know what I've got," but what you've got, my friend, is a dead Christmas tree and thousands of pine needles to clean up.
The Pom Pom Princess
When out in public interacting with other people, situational awareness is kind of important.
While all this woman wanted to do was learn, perhaps she should've spared a few brain cells and realized this hat wasn't the best winter attire for a college lecture hall. Nice look though!
Every Day Is Winesday Wednesday
This is another one of those examples where people need to really think about whether or not they should post something online before clicking "Submit" - especially when you're committing a felony.
Well, if she ever gets kicked out of school, perhaps she'll have a career as a wine sommelier. And if that doesn't work, a drunken wine aunt.
Don't Be Like Chuck
From cheering you up with you're sad to lending an ear when you need help, good friends are always there to support you. Sometimes good friends will even loan you money if you're in a financial bind.
But then there's Chuck. He asked for a loan from an old friend he hasn't spoken to in 20 years but probably should have contacted his bank instead.
The Home Recker
Cheating and bad breakups aren't new, but publicly exposing your dirtbag ex on social media sure is.
If you're going to publicly shame someone for breaking your heart (which is also a questionable decision), at least make sure to first spell check your insults.
The Kids Are "Killing Her Vibe"
There's lying on social media, and then there's just being a jerk.
Look at the smiling faces of her kids...Mommy thinks you're not going to bring in any likes on the 'gram.
Just $99 Dollars To Go
We're not sure if this Snapchat user actually believes that "charging" a $1 is going to turn it into a $100 bill, but we appreciate the unwavering optimism.
So while they might be waiting a while (or an eternity) for their big payday, we can at least applaud the entrepreneurial spirit.
Working From Home
This employee didn't leave their brain cells at home, but rather warmly tucked into their bed. While working/sleeping during a meeting, they accidentally pressed "video" instead of audio", in full view of all of their coworkers.
I work from home in my pajamas half of the time, so I totally get it. But I keep it to myself.
Made With Real Hazelnuts, Cocoa, And Carbon
There is a reason why certain items shouldn't be put into a microwave. Take, for example, glass jars filled with Nutella.
Seriously though, what power level did the girlfriend set the microwave at? Nuclear disaster?
I Get It, Math Is Hard
Look I get it, math is hard and a lot of people struggle with it. But surely you remember enough from grade school to do basic multiplication. And if you truly are that hopeless, calculators or Google are a thing.
Not only did this woman leave her brain cells at home, but she left them publicly on the internet for all to see.
Not Quite Anonymous
This is a valuable lesson in not documenting your trysts with the world.
Because sometimes you forget to edit out the reflection of person you're trying to hide. Hope the reason she's trying to hide him isn't too serious.
What Do You Do For A Living?
Socializing with people can be tricky. And if a server has ever said "Enjoy your meal" and you've responded with, "You too", then you can probably relate to this.
He might not go back to that barbershop ever again, but at least he has a stylish new haircut.
Making Breakfast
This Redditor simply says, "Brain malfunctioned while preparing scrambled eggs" and we can definitely see why.
Sometimes it's just easier to go to a McDonald's and pay someone to make breakfast for you.
Damn, Norway
This driver is going about their day when they spot what appears to be a Confederate flag in another vehicle. They quickly take to social media to voice their displeasure, but we're willing to bet they failed the Civil War unit of their high school history class.
Is that a Confederate flag? No, but the correct answer was literally staring them right in the face.
Investing In Real Estate
You should probably know a topic fairly well before you give other people advice on it. Unfortunately, Kris here did not heed that warning.
Now, just give me a moment to check what the average cost of a home in my city is *checks notes*, ah yes...$700,000. Kris, your advice is bad and you should feel bad.
The Rising And Setting Of The Sun
Pergolas are an impressive way to jazz up a backyard. Large and sturdy, they're great for hanging string lights for added ambiance and offer shade during hot and sunny days.
But this homeowner who just finished building a 18X36 foot pergola, and he underestimated where in the sky the sun is throughout the day. He's not getting any shade, but he is getting sunburns.
Sweet And Salty
Making homemade ice cream isn't as difficult as you might believe, but paying close attention to the recipe is crucial. Spoiler alert: 150 grams of salt and a pinch of sugar was not what the recipe called for.
If you try digging into this salt bomb, I hope you have a giant glass of water (or some blood pressure medication) on standby.
How Dare You Use Your Kitchen To Cook Food?
Everyone has a story about a landlord or neighbor from hell, but has anything ever come as close to this landlord who told his tenant that the kitchen isn't meant for cooking big meals?
This guy didn't leave his brain cells at home so much as he didn't have any to begin with.
Chicken With A Side Order Of Salmonella
This person ordered boneless chicken wings to enjoy during the Super Bowl, and while the wings they ordered were boneless, the companies he had to deal with were brainless.
But who's the bigger idiot? The person who cooked and served raw chicken wings or DoorDash for refusing to refund the $76 order?