Most Uncool Things Boomers Still Think Are Cool
Baby boomers have been known to complain about millennials but generational complaining is nothing new. The Silent Generation also complained about Baby Boomers. Each generation has its differences and those differences often focus on how we live our lives in very different and unique ways.
From wearing jorts to binge-watching 24-hour network news, these are things most people under the age of 40 wouldn't admit to doing. But folks born between 1946 and 1964 often insist that these things are still relevant. If you think any of the following things are significant today... you might be a baby boomer.
They Tend To Love Their Cruises
It's easy to see why baby boomers love going on cruises. Not only do you get to visit new places, but you can also lay out by the pool or hit the buffet in the meantime. Cruises are usually all-inclusive and can take you throughout the Caribbean, Europe, or even Alaska.
The cruises themselves aren't necessarily what's uncool. It's the fact that you'll likely be trapped within a crowd of people on a boat the whole time that serves as the big caveat to going on a cruise.
They Often Throw Down On Racquetball
If you have racquetball rooms in your local gym, chances are half of them are always occupied by a couple of middle-aged men throwing down in the spirit of some good old-fashioned competition.
We can't see why you'd want to give up the open space of a tennis court to be stuck in a sweat-scented room hitting a ball against the wall but at the very least, racquetball is a good calorie-burning sport, so there's that. But really, you hardly see anyone under the age of 50 playing this game.
Many Baby Boomers Won't Stop Wearing Crocs
Crocs are one of the most polarizing articles of clothing around and baby boomers love them. They may be some of the most comfortable shoes (or are they sandals?) on the market but that doesn't change their reputation for being ugly.
We mainly only see medical professionals or Mario Batali wearing these things, mainly because they're on their feet all day. But baby boomers like to complain about a lot of things — especially their tired feet — so it's no wonder why they like to wear Crocs so much.
Potpourri Is Often Found In Their Homes
Seriously, what is the deal with potpourri? We can understand the need to make your home smell pleasant but there are so many other ways to go about doing this. There are candles, aerosol sprays (which aren't good for the environment, but still), and even a good old-fashioned spring cleaning that can make your house smell fresh.
It's certainly better than having a bowl full of dead flower petals in your living room that once you stop smelling you'll forget about and leave there to collect dust for the next seven months.
Chain Restaurants Are Usually Date Night Hot Spots
After work, baby boomers enjoy treating themselves to a night out. They enjoy a nice movie or even the hottest restaurant in town. The only problem is that they think the hottest restaurant in town is their local Applebee's.
Your Neighborhood Grill and Bar and other chain restaurants just like it are frequented by baby boomer couples. With so many better options out there these days, we can't understand why baby boomers would rather settle for something that probably has no more than two-and-a-half stars on Yelp.
Malls Aren't What They Used To Be
Ever since the Internet allowed us to buy nearly anything we needed and have it delivered straight to our doors, shopping malls have become obsolete. At first, malls were a retail mecca where department stores reigned supreme. You'll still find plenty of baby boomers roaming the mall, however, although we're not sure why.
Now, you can buy stuff from Amazon without having to spend the gas money or trudge through crowds of aimless teens. Ironically, malls are becoming more and more uncool for that very reason.
They Can Be Easily Fooled By Conspiracy Theories
From the moon landing to JFK's assassination, conspiracy theories have long fed people the idea that these historic events and more were fake. While conspiracy theories are interesting, they're still only theories. Still, there are plenty of people who believe them and a good percentage of those people are baby boomers.
These days baby boomers are more likely to believe conspiracy theories and spread "fake news" simply because they didn't grow up with the technology that is available today, so they're easily fooled. We guess we know why they rely on 24-hour news networks so much.
24-Hour News Networks Often Cater To Them
The '50s were considered the Golden Age of Television but even then, they still had to wait another 30 years for 24-hour news networks to come around. Most people waited until the evening to get the news from their favorite reporter but in 1980 that all changed when CNN was founded as a 24-hour cable news channel.
By then, most baby boomers were in the prime of their adulthood and loved that they could stay up to date at all times of the day. But these days, they're the only ones who ever watch those channels.
Home Shopping Channels Show Them All The "Cool" Things
If a baby boomer's television set doesn't have CNN or Fox News blaring out of it at all hours of the day, then it's likely on QVC or HSN. These home shopping networks used to be the prime platform to get great deals on neat gadgets or jewelry with a celebrity's name on it. But just like with shopping malls, online shopping has cut out the need for home shopping networks.
So why exactly are they still around? Apparently there's a handful of baby boomers out there who still tune in.
They Will Still Read Reader's Digest
It's been almost 100 years since Reader's Digest became a thing and it's a wonder why they're even still around. How many people off the top of your head do you know actually read Reader's Digest?
If you actually did have an answer for that, then you likely thought of your Aunt Susan, your grandpa, or maybe even your own mother. Reader's Digest has filed for bankruptcy on numerous occasions over the last decade, yet somehow we still see new issues of it in line at the grocery store.
Diamonds Are Incredibly Overrated
They say that diamonds are a girl's best friend – that is if she or someone she knows is wealthy enough to afford those diamonds. Baby boomers sold each other on the idea that "exclusive" and expensive diamonds were the only way to go.
Diamonds are actually quite common and easier to find than most precious gems. But demand increases as they're slowly released in the market, making them wildly expensive. Even some of the biggest diamonds aren't worth much if they don't pass in terms of clarity, color, and cut.
Golf Takes Itself Way Too Seriously
Golf may be a thrilling sport if you're in your 60s, which is where most baby boomers are at these days. This non-endurance sport is popular among wealthy folk who like to pretend to take the game seriously while they discuss business matters.
When you watch golf in person you must stay incredibly quiet and walk long distances to follow the golfers through 18 holes. It sounds boring to watch in person which is why we can't even fathom why anyone would enjoy watching the sport on television.
Knickknacks Are A Waste Of Space
If Marie Kondo was around when baby boomers were becoming adults, then we'd likely have very few knickknacks in this world. As is the case, Miss "Spark Joy" herself wasn't around back then to convince baby boomers they didn't need that mini Hawaiian hula dancer or that seventh hip-swinging Santa Claus.
This is why baby boomers often have a treasure trove of knickknacks lying around their house collecting dust. Unless they're rare collector's items, most of those knickknacks are uselessly taking up space too.
They Might Still Use Yahoo!
When baby boomers use the Internet, they likely have Yahoo! set-up as their homepage. Sure, they got on board when the Internet was invented but still use the thing as if it's 1999. We can't think of anyone who still maintains a Yahoo! email address besides our aunts and uncles and we'd be shocked to hear if anyone uses the Yahoo! search engine over Google.
But hey, at least Yahoo! is still around doing business thanks to the baby boomers who still believe it's one of the best sites on the entire Internet.
They Love To Buy Processed Foods
The same can't be said of all baby boomers but many of them are entrapped in a world of processed foods. Baby boomers grew up in a time where supermarkets and food companies were trying to find out ways to make their products last longer on store shelves.
This is why a lot of food in the supermarket is chock-full of unnecessary preservatives and sugars. It's partly why there was an obesity epidemic for generations that came after them and why healthy food is now trendy.
Ironing Isn't Necessary All Of The Time
Ironing has its place in fashion. You may want to look sharp for a job interview or a new date, but both of those chores require owning an iron and having the time to iron. Millennials can barely afford their rent--why would they waste their time and money ironing pants?
Since the popularity of ironing has dunked, people don't care anymore if clothes appear a bit wrinkly. But baby boomers still think that everyone cares. "Look how wrinkly that is!" said no millennial ever.
Airbrushed T-Shirts Never Looked Good
Those shirts that look like they've been spray-painted may have been "in" in the '70s and '80s. But let's be real: A lot of fashion trends in those look objectively ugly. Not everyone looks good in a perm, and not everyone is fashionable in an airbrushed t-shirt, either.
Actually, we take that back. Nobody looks good in an airbrush t-shirt. Elementary school kids might wear them while running laps for P.E., but if an adult walks up in an airbrush t-shirt, the words "baby boomer" will pop into everyone's mind like a fight-or-flight response.
They Send Emails Outside Of Work Or Business
When's the last time you sent an email to a family member just to say "hi"? If you answered "last week," then congratulations--you're a baby boomer! Nowadays, most people text or message people if they want to catch up or send a relevant article. But baby boomers still feel the need to email everything.
Millennials tend to use email for school and business, and nothing more. Social chatting comes through texting, Facebook, Snapchat, Whatsapp, or literally anything else. Bonus points if a baby boomer cuts out a newspaper article and mails it to people.
They Use Home Phones, Or Even Landlines
The U.S. Center for Disease Control National Health Information Survey reports that 42% of Americans still use landlines as of December 2017. When's the last time you saw a young person using a landline? Or even saw a landline in a movie that wasn't historical fiction?
Most millennials today don't even own home phones, much less a landline. Why have a phone that keeps you in one room when you can use your cellphone anywhere? Don't be surprised if Gen Z kids don't believe that phones with cords exist.
They Keep All Their Paperwork
Everyone knows that paperwork is messy. So why do baby boomers still shove all of their bills, finances, and medical forms into one overflowing box? It's probably because they were raised to do so, but with the spread of computers, millennials have learned a much cleaner way to handle all their bills.
Most businesses have online payments and contracts that you easily access without weeding through piles of paper-cut-inducing useless documents. Let's all face the truth and accept that online paperwork makes everything easier on everyone.
They Type Everything In All Caps
As people grow older, their eyesight fails over time. So it makes sense that baby boomers can read their texts and tweets easier when they type in all caps. However, most phones allow people to increase the size of their text font for this reason. Not to mention that baby boomers don't realize that all-caps sentences affects how people read their message.
IT'S A DRAMATIC CHANGE, ISN'T IT? SUDDENLY, IT SEEMS LIKE WE'RE YELLING. BABY BOOMERS, YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT SEEING "HEY CAN YOU PICK UP SOME APPLES" AND HAVING THE VOICE IN YOUR HEAD YELL IS HILARIOUS.
Stop Using Mrs. Dash
Millennials probably don't even know what this headline means. Mrs. Dash is a spice blend consisting of onion, pepper, thyme, parsley, and a whole bunch of others. Sound familiar? Of course not, because only baby boomers use it.
Spicing up meals can make a dish even tastier, providing that you're not using the same spice blend in every single dish. "Mmm, tastes the same as yesterday! Just what I wanted!" That quote gets attributed to no one, because who has said that? Millennials get more creative with their flavors by turning away from blends and experimenting with single spices.
They're Obsessed With Patterned Wallpaper
Baby boomers can afford a lot more home design and furniture than most millennials can. And what do they do with that privilege? Erect hideous wallpaper everywhere, even in the bathroom.
Most people who tour a house and see patterned wallpaper immediately think, "This is old." Perhaps it wouldn't have become such an insult to interior design if the wallpaper didn't often feature brightly colored or invasive markings that knock the wind out of people, as if the wall could physically punch onlookers in the throat.
They Still Buy Cable TV Packages
Since millennials are all tech-savvy, they know that they can stream their favorite shows on Netflix of Hulu anytime they want. So why would anyone pay $80 a month for everything you can get online with more commercials? Well, baby boomers still do.
These cable TV packages only cater towards baby boomers, since most TV providers know that the internet is robbing most of their market. With the introduction of streaming, millennials can even watch live TV online if they so choose for a much lower price.
Everyone Has Told Them To Cut Down On Fossil Fuels
A 2017 Pew Research Center survey compared Republican millennials to Republican baby boomers, and found that more baby boomers support increased use of fossil fuels (75%) than millennials do (44%). In addition, 45% of millennials admit that they see notice some effect of global warming, in comparison to the 15% of baby boomers.
Not only do baby boomers use up more fossil fuels than any other generation, but many of them remain in denial about its toxic effects on our planet. But what else is new? They won't be around when the rest of us suffer from their practices.
They Make The Weirdest Salads
You think oranges in salads is weird? How about broccoli and apples smothered in mayonnaise? There's a reason why kids hated eating their vegetables, and that might have to do less with the brussels sprouts and more with the mayonnaise. Have we mentioned that they use mayonnaise?
Who could forget Great Aunt Edna's marshmallow and Jell-O salad? We could. Weird baby boomer salads might die with the generation, along with fruit cake. And everyone will rejoice once they realize what they're missing.
They Still Buy From Avon
For those who don't know, Avon is a multi-level marketing makeup company has people buy their products and resell them, similar to Amway. A couple decades ago, few makeup companies besides Avon and Mary Kay existed to pick from. But now we have Sephora, Mac, and Ulta Beauty. Why use Avon?
Avon representatives will go to baby boomers' houses and put on some makeup or, better yet, sell from baby boomer's houses. Millennials know they can get a better deal at a mall store. MLMs like Avon seem to still rake in business from the baby boomers.
Their Beds Have Ten Million Throw Pillows
Pillows! Pillows everywhere! On chairs, on the couch, on the bed, in the car for some reason. Throw pillows aren't comfortable, interrupt the couch space, and take ten minutes to remove from the bed before you go to sleep. Millennials don't have time for that.
Comfort pillows and throw pillows have significantly different purposes here. A comfy pillow can pad a bed or couch, while decorative pillows transform your relaxation area into the back part of a sponge that isn't pleasant to squeeze.
They Use Juice Concentrate
Millennials and Gen Z know the juice experience as taking a bottle out of the fridge, pouring it into a glass, and putting it back in. Juicing can't be more complicated than that, can it? Well, baby boomers may juice their fruit, freeze it, let it thaw, put in ice, and then drink it. If they want more the next day, they have to repeat the entire process.
Sure, juice comes with sugar and fat that your body doesn't need. But why juice it yourself when you can buy a sugar-free variety?
Metal Detectors Aren't Fun
Oh boy! A whole weekend of swinging around a metal pole and finding literally nothing! You can't even talk or anything while you do it, or you might miss the beep. Like golf, millennials don't take metal detecting as seriously as baby boomers do.
Some baby boomers will go out metal detecting every weekend only to find old bottlecaps and scraps of miscellaneous metal. We can't all find ancient Viking treasure, so why keep trying?
They Still Scrub With Bar Soap
Bar soap: slippery, slimy, and sticky all at the same time. How is that possible? Nobody knows, but it somehow manages to become the most annoying way to wash your body in the planet's history. Somehow, though, baby boomers still buy it.
In 2014, CNN brought up that bar soap sales could be declining because of what they call the "Bar soap is for old people" theory, considering that 60% of people over 65 use it. Liquid soap is far easier either way.
